Dear Mommy Writers

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Dear Mommy Writer,

First, I just want to say one thing. Way to go you!

I know it isn’t easy pursuing writing and being a mom. Being a mom is a twenty-four-seven gig. It’s tiring work, whether you’re a SAHM, WAHM, work in a cubicle from nine to five or work at alternative hours. But you’re still writing. So that makes you awesome.


You deserve a medal for finding the time to write. And while preparing meals and doing laundry. Cooking, cleaning and keeping the kids from killing each other. But if all this praise is not elevating your badassery levels then here’s a few points that will.

Write What You Know
As a mother you already have that character market cornered. Using your own experiences you can place your character in scenes you go through every day as a mom. For example getting the kids ready for and dropping them at school. Taking them to their [name of sport] games. Balancing work and parenting. Family vacations. Parent-teacher meetings. Tantrum at the store. Then make it comical or dramatize it. And especially make it real.

Write What You Don’t Know
As a mother you probably have a mommy bucket list. A list filled of things you’d like to do or you once did before you had children. It can be something crazy as climb Everest. Or something simple, that you haven’t had time to enjoy, like having a nice bubble bath with no interruptions. What would you do? How would you feel? How far would you go to fulfill it? Then get into your character’s head and ask the same questions.

Embrace the Annoyingness
Let’s face it, you’re kids are going to annoy you sometimes. So if they’re going to misbehave then as a writer mom it’s within your right to use those in your writing. If they’re going to burst through the bathroom while you’re using it for you to sign a school form. Then you have every right to use their embarrassing moments as inspiration fodder. At least you’re not killing them.

Finding the Time to Write
Sticking to a writing schedule isn’t always easy. You can wake up earlier and write before you and your children start the day. Or wait to write after you’ve put the kids to bed. If neither times work then you’re writing between laundry. Dropping off and picking up children from school. Between nap times and work breaks. Which makes you the George Lucas of mommy writers. Because he never gave up. Despite the misfortunes he suffered while making the first Star Wars film. Can you imagine if he’d given up? There would’ve been no Star Wars. So keep finding the time to write and share your story with the world.

How has being a mommy writer made you a better writer? In what ways has being a mother led to inspiration?

Here’s a link about writing and motherhood by Emily Cavanagh.a37648b4e02227d3e2fe455af945108f

19 comments

  1. Being a mommy writer made me a better writer by forcing me to ditch the rituals. With small kids, I can’t plan writing, there’s no sacred time to write. If I get up early, so will they. I’m exhausted by their bedtime. Instead, it’s however, whenever. Waiting for the bus? Drop some words on a memo app. Something has their attention? Hurry up and write before they notice. There’s no room to clear a desk, boot up a laptop. And somehow I end up writing more than ever before.

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  2. Write what you “don’t” know is my motto. Because very often, that’s the most fun, going where you haven’t gone and making it real. Immersing yourself in worlds of your own making. I was thrilled to see that on your list. I always taught my students to be fearless and to use their imaginations to take them places they could really go later–happened to me! Dreams get real…

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    • Writing what you don’t know was the one thing that my poetry professor said to my class that I’ve kept to my heart the most. Because dreaming up the impossible and writing it to make it alive and very possible is the best part of writing.

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  3. I’m ‘lucky’ in the sense that from August to May I have Monday-Friday basically free to write since my kids are all school age now. I won’t lie and say I use that time wisely, but I have it. I actually find I’m more protective of my time when the kids are home. I think it’s because I’m ‘forced’ to be if that makes sense. With 4 kids, 3 who are still at home, someone always has something going on. But I make it work because I’m still enjoying this roller-coaster ride called Writer. LOL

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    • I’m glad my kids are school age now too. But then that also mean I’m back in school again because I’m helping with projects. On another note they also want to protect my writing time. Sometimes.

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  4. I just started writing today! I had to take a personal day from work to do it, but I’m glad i did. I’m so excited to connect with other busy moms and learn through their experiences. Hope I have time to keep up 🙂

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    • Congrats! I believe when it comes to motherhood and writing, that where there’s a will, there’s a way. As long as you commit to your writing & continue to love your stories, you’ll find a way to keep up that works best for you.
      Good luck writing and hope you had a productive writing day.

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    • Yay! Writing as an outlet is a great way to express yourself. And be very therapeutic. It doesn’t necessarily mean it has to lead to publishing. Happy writing and if you have the chance, include lots and lots of reading time.

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    • Glad the unplanned writing schedule works for you. Can see why too when the randomness probably frees you to write more honestly without censoring yourself.

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