30 Days of Poetry Love 2- Anthology- Sarah Kay*

Credit image: National Poetry Month logo/Poets.org

Happy National Poetry Month day 5!

Today’s poem is by Sarah Kay. I’d stumbled on this spoken word poet when I saw a Button Poetry post on Facebook.

Credit image: kaysarahsera.com

You wouldn’t believe how glad I was when I clicked on the video of Ms. Kay reading her poem “The Type.” This was one time curiosity did not kill the cat.

And if you have daughters, young nieces or cousins, hell grab your girl friends and sit them down. They have to listen to this.

The Type

Everyone needs a place. It shouldn’t be inside of someone else. -Richard Siken

If you grow up the type of woman men want to look at,

you can let them look at you. But do not mistake eyes for hands.


Or windows.

Or mirrors.


Let them see what a woman looks like.

They may not have ever seen one before.


If you grow up the type of woman men want to touch,

you can let them touch you.


Sometimes it is not you they are reaching for.

Sometimes it is a bottle. A door. A sandwich. A Pulitzer. Another woman.


But their hands found you first. Do not mistake yourself for a guardian.

Or a muse. Or a promise. Or a victim. Or a snack.


You are a woman. Skin and bones. Veins and nerves. Hair and sweat.

You are not made of metaphors. Not apologies. Not excuses.


If you grow up the type of woman men want to hold,

you can let them hold you.


All day they practice keeping their bodies upright—

even after all this evolving, it still feels unnatural, still strains the muscles,


holds firm the arms and spine. Only some men will want to learn

what it feels like to curl themselves into a question mark around you,


admit they do not have the answers

they thought they would have by now;


some men will want to hold you like The Answer.

You are not The Answer.


You are not the problem. You are not the poem

or the punchline or the riddle or the joke.


Woman. If you grow up the type men want to love,

You can let them love you.


Being loved is not the same thing as loving.

When you fall in love, it is discovering the ocean


after years of puddle jumping. It is realizing you have hands.

It is reaching for the tightrope when the crowds have all gone home.


Do not spend time wondering if you are the type of woman

men will hurt. If he leaves you with a car alarm heart, you learn to sing along.


It is hard to stop loving the ocean. Even after it has left you gasping, salty.

Forgive yourself for the decisions you have made, the ones you still call


mistakes when you tuck them in at night. And know this:

Know you are the type of woman who is searching for a place to call yours.


Let the statues crumble.

You have always been the place.


You are a woman who can build it yourself.

You were born to build.

-Sarah Kay, The Type

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PS I’m on Unicorn Bell tackling the letter “D” for the A to Z challenge. Curious to find out what the letter “D” stands for? Then click the link. Looking forward to seeing you there and checking out the other A to Z themes!

PSS Today I also have a guest blog on Carrie’s blog, A Writer and her Adolescent Muse, as part of Can You Catch My Flow? blog tour!

a to z-letter D




    • Yes, because too many of them base their everything on a man. Or think they can change them by becoming the type of woman he wants. No, no, no.


    • Felt exactly the same way when I first heard it. And wondering why the hell she wasn’t born earlier so I could’ve heard when I was younger. Nobody explained womanhood and men like this.


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